Wednesday. I have some pretty big wagon wheel tracks running up and down my body from when I fell off the wagon and it rolled right on over me over the weekend. OMG when I fall I really fall. Let’s see. Saturday night went to a party where we had tons of wine and the ONLY food to eat was cheese, cheese and more cheese. I must have used up 1,000 points that one night. At least I had a big brick workout in the morning to use up some calories.
Sunday we had a book club brunch. We were doing Cuba (country of the month) so we went to a Cuban restaurant for brunch. I had TWO Bloody Marys to try to cure my hangover. Rice and beans and salad — not too, too bad. Then I ordered a cafe con leche and it wasn’t until later in the afternoon that I realized how many calories are in full fat milk and cafe con leche is like a whole cup of it. Oh yeah and there were fried plantains too. We went to see The Bodies Exhibit afterwards. After that we didn’t have enough to drink so we found a Cuban bar had Mojitos and MORE fried Plantains — a lot of them. I had some bread too. It was not good. No exercise at all on Sunday — who could exercise with that hangover? 1,000 points.
Monday I had a breakthrough in Bikram yoga. I made it through the class without getting nauseous. Yeah! I still got dizzy trying to do the camel, but I was able to stay with the class for the rest of it. I couldn’t balance or get into half the positions, but I’m not even concerned about that yet! Then Monday night at 10 p.m. I went out for a 10/10 party. A tasting of 10 wines at 10 p.m. Yes, on a Monday night. I have to admit we had fun and the food that they served was excellent. My friend and I positioned ourselves at a table near the kitchen so every time they came out with new appetizers, we had first dibs on the nibs. 1,000 points. Easy.
Yesterday I got back on track but I didn’t really put everything into my tracker until this morning. I was feeling terribly guilty that I had let all of my hard work for the last 4 weeks vanish like one of the glasses of Pinot Noir on Monday night. I was mad at myself and I found it was so hard to get back on track. Suddenly I didn’t want to enter anything in my tracker because it was all bad. I felt I had blown it so there was no point in tracking anything. I kept asking “what’s the point? It is all ruined now.” I agreed with myself that if I couldn’t be perfect I might as well give up.
Of course I know that was not the right answer. We talk about it all the time in WW. I talk about it all the time in my blog. The trick is to get back up every time you fall down. Just like in Yoga — it’s not so important that you complete the pose — just keep trying. Eventually it will come. Changes happen because of the attempt, not because of the completion. I thought of my friend Giddy who had a couple of terrible eating days while away at her marathon. When she got back she got right back on track and finished out the week tracking. I knew that is what I to do, so this morning I go back into my tracker and just started working backwards. I started with what I ate for breakfast today and just kept filling in what I could remember from the weekend. Then I just added 1,000 points because I figure that’s how many points over my limit I am. Of course the worst part is that after working so hard to lose 8.5 pounds this month and wanting to get to 10 pounds — I will probably have gained on Friday. AND, I just found out I have to fly to Minneapolis on Friday so I will have to go my meeting early which will not give me enough time to lose the weight before tomorrow. That stinks!!
Okay, what’s on the good front? Yesterday I did a 1:15 run with hill repeats. I think I did really well. I started out barely moving, as usual, but after I got warmed up I think I was really hauling. I felt good. If only I had run the Brooklyn half half that hard — I would have had a great result. It gave me a good little booster shot that I needed. Maybe, just maybe, there was hope for me yet.
Last night my team played their first match of the season. I lost my match. Big time. I stank. I was so bad and my partner wasn’t playing well either. We just kept hitting everything out, out, out! We showed no control, no finesse, no anything. We started to rally a comeback in the second set but it was too late. Tonight I have another practice — hopefully I can get it in gear. Believe it or not, my serve was not even the problem. LOL!
I have to go on a business trip on Friday. Not really looking forward to it, but I’ll do the best that I can. Just another challenge to face among many. A lot of work on my plate (as well as a lot of food). Trying hard to settle in and be accountable. While I was running yesterday I suddenly noticed that I was actually running pretty fast for me. I actually thought — “whoa, slow down, you don’t run this fast.” But then I thought, if not now, when? These are the days that make up the whole. Right here, right now, this is the hard part — the daily grind. The not giving in. The not giving up. Rumble.
“Never, never, never, never give up.”